Where is Started!
The Montemar was a house on Montemar Way in San Jose California.
As we all look back on our lives, we can point to many different forks in the road that led us to where we are today. Forks that, had we chosen a left turn as opposed to a right turn, so to speak, the entire complexion of life as we know it could and probably would have been different. We would be married to different people, our kids wouldn’t be the ones we have today, we might live in different towns, or even states, our jobs could be entirely different, our friendships probably wouldn’t look anything like the ones we cherish today. Some decisions, like whether to eat at Burger King or McDonalds on a Tuesday afternoon in July, probably didn’t have a huge impact on where we ended up, only when we'll finish. Other decisions completely changed the fate of our lives. As I look back on my life, the choice to live at Montemar, and the randomness of how it came about, is something I often reflect on as having the largest impact of what my life, and the lives of some of my best friends, look like today.
18 years ago I came to California from Bellingham Washington on vacation to visit my mother and brother, who had recently moved to Sunnyvale. The plan was to stay a month then return to Bellingham in time for winter semester. A month passed and it was fall in California. It was still sunny in Sunnyvale – go figure – but Bellingham was in the middle of an epic rain storm. I chose to stay in the sun, work a bit, save some money, and return to Bellingham in the summer. I didn’t want to live with my mother for 8 months so I went out and found a studio apartment. On the weekend I was supposed to sign the lease to my studio, a co-worker said, “I wasn’t going to ask you, but I’m moving out of a room I rent in a house and I need somebody to sublease it. There’s a party there tonight if you want to check it out and meet the roommates.”
“Sorry, I’m signing a lease on a new place and I have to work tomorrow morning.” Was the answer I gave, before moving on with my day, no intention of showing up to a random party with a bunch of people I didn’t know.
Had I gone home and gone to sleep that night, like I said I was going to do, there would be no Montemar. I would have never met Simon, or Mike, or Jake, or Mark, or Justin, or Matt, or Rob, or Joe or any of those guys. I would have never met Tim either - neither would any of you. I would still have known Neil but none of you would have ever met the guy. I probably would have stuck to the original plan and returned to Bellingham in the summer, which means I would have never moved to Rocklin. I wonder if some of you other guys would have randomly ended up in the area or not. If not, Brian, Chris, and Joe may not exist for you either. My job wouldn’t be the same. All my Sacramento area work and golf buddies wouldn’t exist in my mind. I wouldn’t have met my ex-wife either, nor Jovani - my step-son - whom I love to death. Simon probably wouldn’t have met his current wife – they met directly related to a business Neil and I started in Simon’s garage in California. MJ and Joslyn, our daughters, wouldn’t exist. Our friendships and memories would be entirely different in our minds.
But something did happen…
I did decide to go to the party at the house on Montemar Way that night. Much in the same way something happened for Mike Addison when he decided to move into the same house a week prior. Now I couldn’t tell you what the circumstances leading up to Addi moving into the house at about the same time as me, and all the fate and decisions that led to it, but I do remember what drove my decision to attend that party that night. It was as simple as a good ol’ fashion boner. Something that has driven men to make decisions – both good and bad – for eternity. A boner is the reason we have this tournament.
I remember popping the boner early that evening and suddenly having an urge to party. “Perhaps some of these random people at this random party would be pretty ladies, and perhaps some of these pretty ladies might want to play with me,” was the suggestion my penis made to my brain, right before I texted the guy for directions to the party.
My boner didn’t get played with that night but I had a phenomenal time regardless. It was a massive party with a lot of good people. I met Mike and hit it off immediately. Simon and I dominated the beer pong table by the pool for many hours. The next morning I awoke on a couch in the living room and decided that was the house for me.
Addi and Simon introduced me to some of their other friends and years later I was still in California, now with a set of friends/brothers it felt like I’d known forever. Friends/brothers I will know forever. About 5 years later, deeply ingrained in my California life, my California buddies pulled off the surprise of a lifetime.
About a week before my 30th birthday Simon picked me up to take me car shopping – I was in need of a new one. He asked if I wanted to eat and I said, “yeah.” He asked where and I said, “Chilis.” He said what about Hooters and I said, “sure.”
We walked into Hooters in Campbell, California and I was beyond confused when I saw all California buddies sitting with all my Washington buddies. A second later they yelled, “Happy Birthday.”
My California guys, having never met any of the Washington guys, and only knowing names from what I had told them, had tracked down my best buddies and had them fly to California for my birthday surprise. We had a party of 30 people or so and it was one of the best days of my life.
What is even cooler about that has been watching the friendships of my California and Washington buddies flourish over the years, especially when it comes to Neil and the boys. Neil has been to all their weddings, he was in Simon’s. I’m sure all the boys would go to his and some would be in it if hell ever froze over and decided to take that route. Simon and Neil have an incredible friendship, one that often looks like they’re married themselves. These types of things, as well as all the memories we have all made together, are a few of the reasons I’m so grateful that 18 years ago I popped a random boner that led me to the house on Montemar.
For me, The Montemar Classic is the perfect name for this golf tournament because that house embodied and has led to all the things I want this golf tournament to be. For those of you who have decided to take the fork in the road that is the Montemar Classic, my hope for you and us would be that we have a chance to meet new and amazing friends, an excuse to see old friends, and an opportunity to make amazing memories at least once per year with both new and old friends.
20 years down the road I hope to reflect on the Montemar Classic in the same way I reflect on the house on Montemar Way. What friendships and relationships will stem from this tournament? Which Montemar member who you don’t know today will you be good buddies with in 20 years? Who will come up with a stupid game like fingers? Who will you reminisce with about that time you laughed so hard in 2033 when some dumb-shit wouldn’t give Oliver back his cig?
I’m glad that co-worker asked me to check out that room in that house on Montemar Way!
